Season 9, Episode 6 - The Art of the Matter (Part 3)

Challenge: It's the art one! I've already talked about it twice. GOD

Target: Oliver's Dress

KORSimile: "His clothes are valium clothes-- they make you want to fall asleep."

Hmm. Usually boring clothes don't come with a See-You-Next-Tuesday-high slit, but MK has been in the fashion world far longer than I. Thus, I shall defer to His Froofiness.

Anyway, this might be yet another thing I feel like I should have heard of before-- "Valium Clothes." Now, are these types of garments more literal-



"And I'll have a grande 'I'm a total slut who wears idiotic t-shirts with sayings nobody ever said on them' macchiato. You know, make it a Venti."

Or are we talking about clothes that have the effects of valium on you? I have a feeling it might the latter since MK is so bored to tears with Oliver's dress. So maybe it's more like this product: 

 which you put on your dog and it vibrates to calm your dog's doggy neuroses. I hope it's like that, because the idea of this "ThunderShirt" makes me want to laugh at and cry for this poor dog all at the same time. I mean, what kind of stress are you putting your dog under that he needs this massage-y shirt in order to not piss on the floor at all hours of the day? Is your dog studying for the LSATs or something? Does your dog have a big presentation at the office coming up and if he doesn't knock it out the park Mr. Terwilliger will demote him to Mailroom Dog? Is your dog being sued because that cunt cat next door found out about the prostitution ring and is blackmailing him by threatening to go to the press with the information if he doesn't provide an unmarked bag of kibbles under a specified tree at 3am on Saturday? Because those are the only reasons I can think of that someone would need this insane thing.



Season 8, Episode 3 - It's a Party (Part 2)

Challenge: Create a garment using materials from a party supply store.
Target: AJ's Dress
KORSimile: "It looks like a pinata exploded."
Yikes. I mean, pinatas aren't usually this vulgar. Meaning, happy Mexican party toys that you beat with a stick usually don't have beaded pubic areas.

This is Michael's face upon reading my commentary and taking a very different interpretation of beating happy Mexican things with sticks.
I love doing this blog because it lets me do google image searches of stuff that only rarely turns up bare titties. For example, when I searched for "exploding pinata," I got the following images:

A uterus pinata for a "Thank God I'm Not Pregnant" party:

This lovely lady:

This moustachioed young lad:

And a Samoa:

As fun as that was, however, I'm now afraid that my picture is going to turn up when some other weirdo with a blog searches for "mustachioed transvestite eating girlscout cookies at a lesbian feminist party."

Season 9, Episode 1 - Come as you Are (Part 2)

Challenge: Create a garment out of your pajamas.

Target: Julie's pants

KORSimile: "It's a little 'I Like Myself' pocket! Like, 'Hiiiii!'"

The best part was the "Hiiii!" which Heidi clearly thought was hilarious.
While Julie's outfit was just kind of bleh, I think MK is onto something-- the I Like Myself Pocket! For pleasuring yourself on the go!

Have you ever found yourself waiting in a long line at the checkout counter? Or sitting in a boring meeting? Whipping it out would alienate others and most likely get you arrested. What can you do?

Introducing-- the I Like Myself Pocket! A somewhat surreptitious outlet for your latent sexual frustrations! Just slip in a hand and let your mind go back to that time that hobo brushed up against you on the bus. Mmmm, mmm.

Pick up the I Like Myself Pocket in stores today! Now in children's sizes!!

What do YOU think this looks like? Post a comment with your OWN KORSimile!

Season 5, Episode 8 - Double O Fashion

Challenge: Create a look to fit in with Diane von Furstenburg's collection inspired by A Foreign Affair

KORSimile: "I mean, the tailoring is just not happening here...This crotch is every woman's nightmare on how a pant would fit. It's like, Hello! She's got something missing, if you know what I mean."

In Reference To: Stella's cape-suit

Tee-hee, what ever could you mean MK?
Oh. Well, MK surely knows his trannies. I'm betting Stella does too, if you remember her. Her boyfriend's name was Ratbones (seriously), and she had a lovely hidden-penis glow herself.

As for Prunway judges who have an affinity for trannies...
Ten bucks the belly was for show and the only pregnancy she would be involved with is someone who bought sperm from Shim.

What do YOU think this looks like? Post a comment with your OWN KORSimile!