Season 8, Episode 4 - Design your Heart Out

Challenge: Create a dress for the Campbell's Soup "Address your Heart" campaign for women whose lives have been impacted by heart disease.

Target: This Guy's dress (who the fuck is this guy?)

KORSimile: "It's like you took a list of everything that's tacky and put it in one dress."

 What? I don't see people asking how much money a stranger makes in this dress. I don't see any 'dead baby' jokes in this dress, or people tagging pictures of themselves kissing their significant others on Facebook. This dress is far more subdued than half the people I know would have made it (can you say "boobie cut-outs"? Because that's what I'm thinkin').

Clearly MK has not spent enough time in Ocean City to be really familiar with tacky.



Ooh gurl, you been workin' out??





Season 9, Episode 6 - The Art of the Matter (Part 2)

Challenge: Create a look inspired by a piece of art created in collaboration with a student from the Harlem School for the Arts.

Target: Josh C.'s Thing that Makes this Model Look Even Worse

KORSimile: "She looks like a Victorian cocktail waitress in Vegas!"

For once, I'm not going to analyze the KORSimile. Instead, I'm going to talk about the Bonus Heidi.

Bonus Heidi: "The first thing I thought was, 'I'm gonna be a hooker for Halloween!"

Yeah, Heidi. YOU AND THE REST OF THE FUCKING FEMALES IN THE UNIVERSE.

Trick or Treat! I'll give you a hint-- the treat is crabs!

On that note, I have figured out what I'm going as for Halloween:

Come search in my caves, baby.

Season 4, Episode 5 - What's the Skinny

Challenge: Create a garment for a woman who has recently lost a significant amount of weight out of her favorite fat clothes.

Target: Chris March's Dress

KORSimile: "All she's missing to me is a cigarette and a beret in Paris in 1957, and it's a little Shirley MacLaine when she played a hooker with a heart of gold."

Man oh man, if anyone should do well with fat clothes, it would be Chris March.

Ok, that was really mean and I know that, but two things:

1. I'm a bitch

2. Jay McCarrol, the winner of Season 1, was also a fatty fat fat and he lost a shit-ton of weight on Celebrity Fit Camp and now looks awesome and I love him, so HINT, CHRIS MARCH.

Anyway, I'm conflicted about this KORSimile. On the one hand, MK is totally right. This outfit could definitely fly in a community theatre production of Sweet Charity.
On the other hand, I think we need to stop conceptualizing hookers as having "hearts of gold." I'm sure there are probably hookers out there who are nice people and all, but at the end of the day, they still have sex with strangers for money. For example, these young ladies here don't seem particularly gilded.

They would like you to try their asian salad, though.

This episode is also where I started to suspect that Heidi is, in fact, a FemmeBot.